The Silent Struggle: The Complex Reasons Behind Unreported Sexual Assault

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month, a time designed to bring awareness to an issue that often remains veiled in silence. At OneEighty, we’re dedicated to breaking that silence and providing crucial support to sexual assault survivors.

To shine a light on the complex reasons why victims of sexual violence hesitate to come forward, we interviewed Kate Abruzzino, Victim Advocacy and Outreach Manager, and Crystin Troyer, Victim Advocate and Outreach Specialist at OneEighty. With their extensive experience in supporting survivors of intimate partner violence, domestic violence, sexual assault, and related victimizations, Kate and Crystin offer invaluable perspectives on the barriers victims face and how OneEighty is working to bridge the gap.

A Passion for Advocacy: Kate and Crystin’s Roles at OneEighty

As OneEighty’s Victim Advocacy and Outreach Manager, Kate plays a vital role in supporting survivors and helping them navigate the complex emotional and legal aftermath of sexual violence. As the manager, Kate provides support to all victim advocates, not just those at OneEighty. Working alongside Crystin, who has been with OneEighty for three years, the two advocate for victims by offering counseling referrals, safety planning, and emotional support. They also provide support through the civil and criminal court processes for a variety of case types, including protection orders.

“Our role is to provide survivors with options,” Kate explains. “We can talk with them about reporting, connect them with counseling, or help them create a safety plan. But ultimately, we empower them to make decisions that feel right for them.”

OneEighty’s advocacy team extends beyond Kate and Crystin, with additional advocates supporting survivors in Holmes and Wayne counties. Their goal is to be a ready and willing resource, helping survivors regain control over their lives.

The Familiar Betrayal: When the Perpetrator Is Known

One of the most significant hurdles victims of sexual assault face is the unsettling truth that these crimes are overwhelmingly perpetrated by someone the victim knows. As Kate explains, “Eight out of ten perpetrators are a person very close to you, or somebody that’s known to you.” This stark statistic from RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) underscores a chilling reality: the person who violates someone’s trust is often a friend, partner, ex-partner, classmate, or colleague.

Imagine the internal conflict a victim might experience: the person who caused immense pain was once someone they trusted or even loved. This familiarity creates a web of complex emotions, making the decision to report incredibly difficult. Victims may feel an overwhelming sense of guilt or concern for getting the perpetrator in trouble, especially if there are emotional ties. They might fear repercussions for reporting, leading them to question themselves due to manipulation, grooming, gaslighting, or the involvement of alcohol or drugs.

Navigating the Complexities: Beyond Familiar Faces

This situation becomes even more complicated when we consider the fear of retaliation or threats from the perpetrator. Victims often grapple with a fear that no one will believe them, especially if they’ve had negative experiences reporting in the past. As Kate points out, “People not believing is a big one as well, or the fear that people won’t believe you.” This fear intensifies when the perpetrator holds a position of power or influence. They might be famous, wealthy, or well-respected in the community, leading to a sense of helplessness and intimidation for the victim.

Furthermore, the law enforcement and court systems can be daunting and overwhelming, particularly for those unfamiliar with the process. Many victims also face internal struggles, including:

• Past traumas
• Religious beliefs about forgiveness
• Societal stigma
• Legal consequences if illegal activities were happening during the assault

Another common barrier is the misconception that sexual violence only involves physical assault. “Sexual violence is an umbrella term,” Crystin explains. “It includes different forms, like molestation, stealthing, revenge porn, lack of consent, and human trafficking. Many people don’t recognize the wide range of experiences that fall under this category, which can make survivors question whether what happened to them ‘counts’ as assault.”

Trauma often causes delayed reporting as well. “We see a lot of survivors who have spent years – sometimes decades – trying to suppress their experiences,” Crystin reports. “It’s only when they start working with a counselor or feel safe enough to confront their past that they consider speaking out.” Kate adds.

Common Misconceptions About How Survivors React

Society often expects victims to respond in a specific way – immediately reporting the assault, showing outward distress, or fighting back in the moment. However, real-life trauma responses vary widely.

“People think there’s a ‘right’ way to react after an assault,” Crystin notes. “But in reality, survival instincts take over. Some people freeze, some go into shock, and others try to minimize the experience just to get through it.”

Crystin adds, “It’s important to recognize that every survivor’s response is valid. Just because someone didn’t report right away or didn’t physically resist doesn’t mean what happened to them wasn’t real or traumatic.”

How OneEighty Supports Sexual Assault Survivors

For those who are uncertain about reporting, OneEighty provides judgment-free guidance.

“We are here to walk them through their options,” Kate explains. “They can talk to law enforcement if they choose, but they don’t have to. If they want a medical exam, they don’t have to provide the perpetrator’s name.”

Another critical part of OneEighty’s support is safety planning. “Beyond the immediate crisis, survivors often need help figuring out how to feel safe again – physically, emotionally, and mentally,” Kate says. “We help them take steps to regain their security, whether that means getting a protection order, finding temporary shelter, or simply having someone to talk to.”

OneEighty is here to support survivors however they choose to move forward. Crystin points out that justice can look different for everyone. “For some, justice means going to court. For others, it means telling a trusted friend or attending a support group. No matter what path a survivor chooses, we’re here to help them regain their voice.”

The Power of Community: Why Survivors Should Attend the April Support Group

OneEighty’s free virtual Sexual Assault Support Group offers a safe space for survivors to connect with others who understand their journey.

“It’s co-facilitated by advocates, so we provide education and guidance,” Kate shares. “But it’s also a chance for survivors to share their experiences, talk about their healing, and support one another.”

The virtual format makes it accessible for those with transportation barriers or who feel safer attending from home. “Being in a community of other survivors can be incredibly healing,” Crystin adds. “It helps people realize they’re not alone, and that sexual violence doesn’t discriminate – it affects people of all genders, races, and ages.”

A Message to Sexual Assault Survivors: You Are Not Alone

For those struggling to report their experience, Crystin has a simple but powerful message: “We believe you.”

“Our advocates stand by survivors,” she continues. “We support them however they need us to, whether that means listening, offering resources, or helping them take the next step toward healing. No one should have to carry this burden alone.”

An individual seeking support at OneEighty will get to make their own decisions about how to move forward. Kate reiterates, “You have choices, and we’re here to make sure you know that.”

If you or someone you know needs support, OneEighty is here to help. Reach out to learn more about advocacy services, counseling options, and the upcoming Sexual Assault Support Group in April. You are not alone.